Yesterday someone dropped by my blog by searching ‘a letter to my ex about his dead best friend’.
Since I saw it, I’ve been wondering what can you tell someone who lost their friend, family member or anyone else close to their heart? Can you comfort them?
Answering my own question, I will say: No, you can’t.
What could you tell such person?
That everything will be ok? That this person would like us not to be said? That they would like us to keep on living?
Honestly, it’s all bullshit. Whatever we say, they won’t listen.
They need to go through mourning phase. Let them stay alone for a while, let them sit at home hugging dead person’s stuff, let them cry, let them stay in bed all day. If they do it, it means they need it.
In my opinion all you can do for this person is making them know you are there for them. That you are there whenever they need you. All they need to do is say a word.
If their grief takes too long then you can start doing.
Force them to go out or do something with them. But talking won’t help. Nothing you say will make them better.
As they say, time heals. It’s truth. All you can do is just being there.