Lately, out of blue, I was thinking about my previous ‘relationships’ and guys I liked a lot. I realized they all were just assholes!
They treated me bad, without respect, with no love. I can’t believe I’ve been so stupid before. I don’t know why I let them for that. Maybe I was stupid, maybe I was blind or maybe I was naive. Maybe I let them treat me this way hoping that they will change or just thinking they have bad time in their lives.
I’m still wondering do I have such bad luck for assholes or maybe I was too kind and I made them treat me bad. It’s not like they only treated me bad. No. They had moments of making me happy and loved, but not too often. Or maybe I just expect too much. Maybe respect and care is too much to ask for in a relationship.
My confusion was one of the reasons to take a break from any kind of relations and live by my own. I want to make a distance from everything that happened in my love life and be able to meet other people and see what I really want and what I can get.
If I attract only assholes then I need to find a reason of that and fix it. Maybe I send vibes to them saying: ‘I’m easy to fool, come play with my feelings’.
Enough is enough and it’s time for me to make the rules not to adapt to them.